Blending Issues,  fatherhood,  Relationships

“Money, Sex &…Blending!”

Reading Time: 4 minutes

What up My G’s! Let me get straight into this joint. If your paper ain’t tight, and you don’t have your own s#%t, it’s going to be difficult to blend your family. Being a great PreNup Pops alone is not going to get you access to that “wet – wet” on a nightly basis. Just because you haven’t taken them nuptials, but still faithful, and a good parenting partner, is not enough. Bruh, your lady wants to be provided for as “if” y’all was married. She wants the rent paid, bills paid, eat good, kids straight, hair did, ride fresh, nails done, and that “bag” to stay full My G! When you’re blending as a cohabitational family, you can’t “afford” to consistently “fall short” financially as a provider. Your ability to secure the fam is scrutinized by “everybody.” As a matter of fact, your economic ability to secure the crib is what most “women” (mothers especially) assess to determine your “value” to her security. Best believe that if you can’t secure that bag, your “pusniyee” is in jeopardy too! Real talk fam! Listen, lets be real, what woman you know that’s trying to level up got a broke n!gg@ keeping her down?! Money and sex go hand and hand with blending. You really not blending s#%t if you can’t take care of s#%t! (period!)

If you didn’t know, let me put you on, relationships cost! So, if relationships cost, blending cost. You can’t expect to build a strong cohabitational family, and your a$$ is broke. The kids, nor your lady will sincerely respect you if you can’t afford to provide for them. For real, for real, blending a fam is not a complicated task. The time that is takes to build meaningful relationships in the home is predicated on consistently being together in the same space. But if you keep getting evicted from that “space,” or the condition of your “space” isn’t conducive for bonding, then their won’t be too much blending that occurs. Time cost, and “space” cost as well. It takes money to posses both. Therefore, it’s damn near impossible to genuinely blend a family when your paper is in constant flux! Not to say money is the end all, be all to blending, but it’s a significant aspect to establishing influence, order, and priority when it comes to building [new] household relationships. No kid wants to “deal” with someone who “ain’t” their daddy, acting like they’re runnin’ s#%t, and them kids know he broke as hell! Kids aren’t stupid dawgg, they know what’s up! So as a PreNup Pops, you got to be about business from the jump. And if your lady not about her business, she’ll front on you just like the kids. I know sometimes money gets tight, and s#%t happens, but that’s why as parenting partners we have to stay on the grind! My G, if you grind hard (and smart), the money will come. Stay in your lane, and be consistent. That’s the key to building meaningful relationships within your blended fam. 

I know you’ve heard this saying “happy wife, happy life!” Man, I’m so tired of hearing that BS when it comes to marriages. I understand the concept, but families today aren’t centralized around the “wife” position anymore. Cohabitational households don’t have a “wife.” Moreover, emphasis on the title of “wife” don’t exist in cohabitational fams. So on some real s#%t, placating to the “wife” (position) disrupts the continuity in the home. Over emphasis on the women creates dogmatic ideals that don’t reflect the “true” values of a blended cohabitational families. What good is it if momz is happy, and the rest of us are miserable. Now mom in the crib gettin’ on everybody damn nerves, but you better not make her “unhappy!” (that’s bulls#%t!!! – in my Burnie Mack voice…God rest his soul!)

In my new book “X Laws of a PreNup Pops,” I inform men to never, ever, ever, ever, let sex be a motivating factor in their position/role as a PreNup Pops. Developing sexual energy in a blended home can be difficult in the beginning. So much concentration is being focused on the kids, and their comfort. And that’s good. But the kids comfort, and your lady’s concern for the kids, shouldn’t devalue your need for that “booty!” Truth be told, many blended couples suffer from a lack of sexual continuity because the woman has issues adjusting to how her kid’s feel about their mother’s “activities” with her new partner! “Gettin it IN” should be a natural flow of the relationship! I understand the stress, and anxiety of adjusting to a new reality, but frequency of sex shouldn’t be determined by the kid’s visitation weekends! Like for real, “sex” is why most cohabitational family exist! (Helluurrr!!) My G, be persistent in pursuing a fair, healthy, balance of getting the pusniyee! Don’t let “blending” be a “hinderance” to having a satisfying sex-life. If you’re giving your best to your fam, you should receive the best from your lady!

PreNup Pophood is rewarding – hands down! But it only works well when there is “real” honesty about what really happens in a blended crib. I stay true to the game, and I expect the same in return from my fam. I love my seedlings, and my lady! They mean the world to me, but not at the expense of my own personal health. We’re in this “together!” None of us can build a life without money! Everything in this world cost. And I’m damn sure not ’bout to not “get it in!” – you betta check my last name!!! (sorry dad!). The success of blending our cohabitational families is led by real men, who understand the real purpose of fatherhood!

What's good fam!!! I'm a divorced father of (8), and currently engaged to the most beautiful joint I've every seen! Let me break it down (6) kids are my bio-seedlings, and the other (2) sweet-hearts belong my soon-to-be wife! I'm an entrepreneur (hustler), and author. Fatherhood is my calling and passion. This blog is for My G's that hold it down for their "blended" fam, but haven't taking them nuptials. I'm all about empowering fathers and building strong families!

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